


A Fair Trade

by LazySintastic13 (EmeraldWriter)



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Underfell, Alternate Universe - Underswap, M/M, Underfell Papyrus, Underfell Sans, Underswap Papyrus, Underswap Sans, honeymustard - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-26
Updated: 2017-03-26
Packaged: 2018-10-10 19:58:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 413
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10446213
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EmeraldWriter/pseuds/LazySintastic13
Summary: Just as mustard was everything to Red, so are honey bottles for Stretch.





	

“Red!”

The small skeleton teleported without another thought, eyes teary as he held onto the tall one’s shoulders.

“S-Stretch, what do we do?”

“C-C-Calm down. Calm down, dammit. I got this.” His tone quivered, reassuring no one. But he held his defensive stance and stood strong. “You’ll have to go through me if you want Red!”

The monster before them wore a deadpan expression, before face palming. “For fuck’s sake, give me back my brother, you stinking weed!”

“Never! Go Red, leave while you can! I’ll hold him back.”

“No Stretch! I won’t leave you!”

“Red, you must.”

“But I—”

“Oh for the love of—” Fell took out a bottle of honey. “I’ll make a trade with you.”

Stretch snorted. “Hah! Like I’d give Red for a—”

Then, Fell snapped his fingers and two boxes filled with honey bottles dropped before him.

Silence loomed over the trio, until fake tears fell from Stretch’s eyes as he looked away. “… I’m sorry, Red.”

“ _What?!_ Are you fucking serious?!”

“You don’t understand. It’s two boxes. Red. Two boxes.”

Red dropped their cheesy act and growled. “Fucki—”

Fell appeared behind his brother and grabbed him before he could try running away. “Now, that’s settled, we’re going home, Sans.”

The small skeleton didn’t put up a fight as he was carried on his brother’s shoulder. “Two boxes, Boss! I’m worth _two_ fucking boxes!”

Stretch waved them farewell with a handkerchief in hand. “I’m sorry, my love.” New tears were added for the dramatic effect.

And Red gave him a middle finger. “We’re so over you piece of shit!”

“I love you too~”

And with that, the skeleton brothers teleported out just as Blue came down the stairs to check out what was going on. The skeleton gave Stretch a questioning look.

The latter chuckled and shrugged. “Red was using me as an escape to doing his chores.”

“Ah, and you traded him off.”

“No one understands.”

Blue huffed. “Paps, you traded your boyfriend for honey bottles.”

“It’s two boxes, Blue. _Two!_ ”

The small skeleton sighed, shaking his head. “He’s going to have a fit when he comes back.”

“He’ll come around. In fact—”

“We are not buying him boxes of mustard bottles.”

“But he'll—”

“No, Papy.”

Stretch huffed. “All right, I’ll think of something else then.”

“Yeah, you go do that.” Blue headed for the kitchen, but not before saying, “By the way, we are not keeping your honey bottles. Take one and throw away the rest.”

“Sans!”

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by laukitus from their art here:  
> https://laukitus.tumblr.com/post/156675342415/b4-un-petit-honeymustard-dd


End file.
